Coffee Cup Memos

I have returned home after enjoying a two-week vacation, and I…feel…rested. It was a much-needed break from all my work because my mind and soul were begging to be benched. I’ve accumulated too many sleepless nights only to realize that more things kept crawling onto my list. Will I ever get this stuff done?

If you are anything like me, you want to be of good service and help people out. It just feels good to know you’ve contributed something of value. However, the more you do it, the less time you have to get essential work done. I’ve learned that whatever you say “Yes” to, you are also saying “No” to something else.

A colleague once asked me, “Now who’s doing your job?” That was a really good question because she made me think about my true priorities and challenged me to be more protective of my time. If I have the opportunities to delegate or say “No”, then I should exercise those options judiciously.

With the convenience of virtual meetings, it’s much easier nowadays for my calendar to get layered with overlapping appointments. Transitions between them are nearly non-existent, and I must decide which ones to accept. It is no wonder why I feel a little more stressed — I now have to selectively let a few people down. In my experience, saying “Yes” to a lot of things has a drawback because I slowly release control of my time to other important people and things. Have you ever asked, “Where did all my time go?” I certainly have. And honestly, it’s my fault because I should have been guarding my time with a few strategic parameters. Remember, every “Yes” requires a “No” somewhere else.

What must I give up if I commit myself to a new project or task? I cannot be everything to everyone all the time because my sense of agency diminishes and my availability thins out. When I find myself easily irritable and frustrated more frequently, then I am not in a good place. My overall outlook gets sour and that can negatively affect how I view and treat people. Hence, the need to map out periods of rest throughout the year. I believe one of the secrets to career longevity is proactively planning your time off and managing your calendar well. Otherwise, you might overwork yourself into an unhealthy state.

This year, my family and I ventured through the streets of Washington D.C. We visited impressive monuments and museums, and appreciated all the art, history, and architecture to our hearts’ content. Even though it was hot, walking outdoors from one site to another gave us the up-close experience of the city’s hustle and bustle. We even walked through a rainstorm that drenched us with cool relief from the summer heat. Ahh! For a moment, we were all carefree kids enjoying this playful adventure!

The key lesson here is that even though our souls are eternal, our bodies are not. We are humans, designed to enjoy life during the day and slumber through the night. If anything disrupts that cycle for extended periods, then we become fatigued, and in the worst case, become depressed and delirious.

If you ever find yourself in a funk like me, then give yourself the gift of rest. Take a day off, enjoy 3-day weekends, and seriously plan for annual vacations. We all need time to have fun, rest, and celebrate. Why do you think God commanded that we honor the Sabbath weekly? It was for our benefit, not his.

So be more intentional about taking a break. You really owe it to yourself. Trust me, your work will be there tomorrow, and you’ll be able to face it with a renewed energy and purpose.